5 Tips to Encourage Self-Motivation in Your Little One

Do you find your little one less enthusiastic about playing with her friends? Does she seem aloof to you about everything else? Do you find that she is deteriorating in her studies as well? If you nodded in affirmation, then there are high chances that your little one lacks self-motivation.

Self-motivation is the key that leaves a great impression on how your little one is pacing in her daily life. From performing well in the curriculum to building some good habits, a self-motivated child can do wonders with her life. Motivation comes naturally until the age of seven, but up till reaching this age group a kid is observing her surroundings and always learning something new. However, after the age of seven, she must be able to motivate herself.

Although self-motivation is an inside process and varies from kid to kid, as a parent, you can always motivate and push your child to nurture her ability to do better and better. Here’s how you can do that:

1. Stay Positive

Even if she is failing at something, always dwell on the efforts she is putting in rather than nagging about the things she is not good at. If there is a problem, try to be compassionate and come up with a solution. You will soon see this positive outlook and behavior being reflected in your little princess.

2. Appreciate Efforts

Rather than just saying ‘good job’ for everything, take some time to rethink how you want to appreciate all the good things that she is doing. For example, if she shares her toys with her friends, you can acknowledge her good behavior by complementing, “Your friend must have enjoyed and felt immensely good when you shared your toys with her”. This will motivate your charming daughter to always behave well and do good in other aspects of her life.

3. Tackle Failures

Tell your little bundle of joy that it is okay to lose sometimes. What is important is the attempt and what she learns from failing at it in the first go. This trait of gracefully accepting the defeat and moving on from setbacks will prove immensely beneficial later in her life.

4. Adopt Learning Style

When a certain subject is hard to learn for your kid, then you can encourage the learning through fostering her interests. Suppose if she likes baking, you can teach her the measuring concepts by teaching her how to measure the ingredients. This will teach her about size, volume, and density without even making it appear like a burdensome math lesson.

5. Build Self-Esteem

When she believes in herself, any difficult mountain can be moved with ease. Building a positive self-esteem will open the ways towards building self-esteem. Help your little one to build self-esteem and believe in herself, then there won’t be even a single thing that she would think of as unattainable. You can always try to look out what she enjoys doing the most and how she interprets the right from the wrong.

Final Word

Like any other parent in the world, you would also want your little one to be successful in school and later in her life as an adult. Set your little one on the path of success by inculcating self-motivation. Always encourage your pretty princess to go beyond the boundaries and achieve big. It is a vital skill that is needed for whatever she chooses to do in her life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Vaaridhi_Vairagi/2356146

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Parents: 4 Apps That May Keep A Child Safe Online

Parental-control apps for smartphones can help kids understand the concept of limits that should not be crossed, for their safety, in this digital world. That is, these security apps could help educate and prevent children from taking certain actions and accessing improper contents, such as texting with strangers or viewing adult contents, respectively, while at the same time, respecting their privacy. If a parent intends to monitor a child/children’s device for harmful activities in this modern age, then a parental control application that works well on mobile platforms, in addition to the desktop is needed. This post will discuss 4 of these apps that could help every parent keep their kids safe online from the dangers of society. But first, in general, what do these apps comprise?

The best parental control apps offer ways to limit time spent on a device, filter for harmful words, image and videos, monitor online behavior, protect kids privacy, track usage and location, and block other apps or games as necessary. So without further waste of time, let’s take a look at the following 4 apps, which offer these features, every parent should consider:

Qustodio
Qustodio is user-friendly, efficient, and excellent for busy parents. The dashboard shows a child’s recent mobile activity for any connected device, including time spent on specific websites like Instagram or Twitter. The dashboard also offers options to set time limits spent on a website, track texts, filter out racy sites, and set time limits for any game or app. It’s relatively not invasive, but still effective – a great control app to use when managing devices for kids of multiple ages. It also works on Kindle, if one is interested in protecting kids on Amazon devices.

Norton Family Premier
Norton Family Premier packs just about any feature a parent could ask for into its mobile-device-management service, giving a parent control over multiple features on multiple devices. A parent may not be able to monitor every aspect of how kids use their Android phones, but with the web-filtering, app-monitoring, and location-tracking features, parents are sure to have enough control to remind kids to responsibly use their mobile devices.

The Norton app, just like Qustodio app, can help parents monitor multiple devices and multiple children. It’s easy to set up age-appropriate profiles on the Norton Family Premier, and even easier to port them across multiple devices.

SafeToNet
SafeToNet is a cyber safety company that safeguards children from bullying, sex extortion, and abuse on social networks. It is also a messaging app. The SafeToNetapp is built on an AI environment that can textualize the messages that kids receive, figure out what’s harmful, and filter it before the damage is done. It’s a deep tech, a multi-faceted solution that goes way beyond AI behavioral analytics. It analyses changes in child’s behavior and notifies parents of any suspicious change.

“SafeToNet’s award-winning software safeguards children and youngsters from online risk such as bullying, sex extortion, abuse, and aggression. It protects kids from making mistakes and prevents harmful messages from being sent to social networks and messaging apps.” ~ SafeToNet

SafeToNet’s systems are fully automated and do not require human interventions to review content. Parents never get to see what their kid(s) sends and receives. This means that a kid’s right to data privacy are fully maintained and respected.

Once the SafeToNet app is installed on a child’s device, and linked with their parents’ SafeToNet account, the software scans for any inappropriate image on the child’s device(s). If such an image is found, it will quarantine it, and blur the image so it no longer presents a sharing risk.

Bark
Bark, a mobile safety app for kid online, created by a startup founded by Twitter alumni, is hoping to blaze a new trail in a child’s online safety. The software employs machine learning to detect signs of negative behavior on a teen’s phone, including cyberbullying, sexting, depression, and suicidal thoguhts and informs parents and school administrator of such threat.

The machine learning algorithm does all the work, operating in the background mining for red flags. It also works with most social platforms, such as Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter, Gmail, YouTube, and kik, among others.

Bark, unlike the traditional “parental control” software or net nanny-type watchdog applications, strikes the right balance between respecting a child’s right to privacy and protecting them from online predators and cyberbullying, while also looking out for issues like sexting or mental health concerns. And in that regards, it has been stated to have the potential of alleviating school shootings.

The Bark app doesn’t give parents or school administrator full access to their child/children’s social activity, but it monitors for potential issues and identifies language that may be of concern. Codes like “CD9” or “9” – which stands for “parents are nearby,” or “53X” for “sex” are examples of what the software tags in its search.

Any of these 4 apps can be effective at providing online security for kids, but it is, however, recommended that every parent use at least 2 of these apps for a more effective protection of their child/children when they are online.

Please feel free to leave us comments about a similar app(s) and updates.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Ken_Parth/2510758

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Lonely Lana Changes Her Mind

14 year-old Lana was fed up of feeling left out of a group of girls at her new school.

Moving schools can be tough at any age and Lana, one term in, was yearning for the feelings she used to associate with her old group of pals.

In truth she still saw the old gang socially and had actually been quite unhappy with them too, but somehow her brain started having her recall the past friendships as much better than the reality had been.

The new girl group was tight which she believed meant they had all been friends since being small; compounding her feelings that it was impossible for her to become a part of them. She came to see me asking for help with ‘social exclusion’.

We established that a couple of girls in the group were being especially kind and friendly towards her but this didn’t seem to satisfy Lana’s needs of belonging to the main group and she found herself:

1. Dismissive of the presenting opportunity to forge new friendships; looking beyond the friendly girls, keeping her sights fixed firmly on the big group.
2. She had begun fantasising the old school friendship group was perfect despite this contradicting previous session discussions.
3. She felt she had lost something of great value i.e. being at the centre of a group of friends. and forgetting the friendship problems previous encountered
4. She had interpreted the body language of certain group members as meaning they didn’t want to include her.
5. She felt awkward and self conscious.

To help her to understand the mind mechanics of think-feel-do we started by exploring her feelings:

FEELINGS self-conscious and awkward around new girl group.

BEHAVIOUR withdrawing/wanting to withdraw from the group’s periphery.

SENSES Perceived the group was unsure about her unpredictable behaviour and viewing her with suspicion.

THINKING which meant they don’t like her.

FEELINGS feeling lonely and sad.Then angry and frustrated when she realised her thoughts and behaviours had been contributing to the situation.

Lana was about to discover the key to her happiness was to realise that ‘something’ triggered the feelings, and that something was her thinking patterns.
Trigger thoughts included:
“Making new friends is hard work and tiring”
“Belonging to a big group is important”
“Real friends listen to me and I can say anything to them”
“My old friends were ideal”
“I miss my old friends”

Those thoughts triggered the feel-bad strategy to start running in a loop:
THOUGHT triggers FEELING influencing BEHAVIOUR.

DRILLING FURTHER INTO THE PROBLEM
Lana’s friendship goal had been to be popular amongst a large group of girls. Yet, she could never control a goal that requires other people to change. Trying to do that had been exhausting and frustrating, wasting energy and leading to disappointment in others and feelings of unhappiness.

EXPLORING SOLUTIONS
How to help Lana to amend her friendship goal to feeling relaxed and authentic around new people; interested in them and having fun = getting to be in charge of the goal.

Not only could she control this goal, she would actually reinforce some self esteem through achievement like having fun (rather than eroding self esteem by setting goals that could never be achieved).

Getting Lana to change her thinking would in turn drive new feelings and therefore change how she behaved. Change the thinking is key – it puts her back in control:

EXPERIMENT
We explored changing the ‘trigger thoughts’ by imagining that she had lost all her friendship memories – all of them (good or bad). Then imagine herself pitching up at school, relaxed, fresh, looking for fun people to get to know and generally feel happy. She was sure she’d feel happy in this scenario.

FEEDBACK
SO that tells her the obstacle to feeling those natural responses (relaxed, fresh, looking for fun people to get to know and generally feel happy) had been her trigger thoughts which had simply habituated.

FEED FORWARD
How to un-habituate the thoughts?
We decided to take the approach of catching them – the thoughts and become aware that they are not truths, just patterns of rehearsed brainwaves and neuro-chemistry.

And challenge her own thinking like expanding all the reasons why someone might have ‘closed’ body language. We drew up a list: cold, unwell, feeling scared, worried etc until Lana accepted that she could never really know what another person was really thinking or feeling.

But if she thought the closed body language meant they didn’t like her… guess what? She now had a ‘trigger thought’ to run a feel-bad strategy.

We explored new mind experiments to discover just how much influence she really has over her thinking and feeling. Concluding:

PRACTISE THOUGHTS SO THEY BECOME HABITS e.g.

• Everyone is unique, some people talk more than they listen, others listen more than they talk.
• Friendships groups are dynamic which means people come and go, behaviours shift and change, feelings rise and fall.
• Individual friendships are easiest to build.
• Being interested in someone is the best friendship gift you can give.
• Value the good friendship skills experienced at the previous school.
• Remember what she is gaining (not feeling that something has been lost).

ACTIVITIES TO DO

• Balloon Breathing & Balancing Body & Mind activities
• Keep a diary of things she is grateful for (at least 3 each day) to train her brain to build new thinking lines in her mind.
• Look at the friendship group through new eyes – ‘what she likes to see, hear, do with the girls’.
• Keep a diary of what life skills she is gaining each day e.g. tolerance, acceptance, curiosity.

CONCLUSION
o Friendships are dynamic.
o Resilient thinking enables children and young adults to make new thinking, feeling and behavioural connections.
o Next generation mind mechanics are key to thriving.

Happy Brain is a project that teaches children and young adults new skills for creativity, learning and thriving. Happy Brain helps young people take control of their thinking, self regulate their feelings and learn how to choose behaviours that drive a rewarding future.
Learn how to become a Happy Brain Coach!
kay@the-me-group.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Kay_Cooke/2533907

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Some Quranic Tips to Prevent Your Kids From Telling Lies

Have you ever faced a situation where you almost have to beg your young ones to tell you the truth because you believe his answer was not what you really hope to hear? You keep on begging and then, come the magic phrase, “it is sinful to lie!”

If you are smiling as you read this line, I am smiling at you too.I already know the answer. We all did that. Often times, after repeating the same phrase our words fall on deaf ears. The phrase, “it is sinful to lie” become too common on your lips and your child’s ears yet, you still want to instill the same values. What options are you left with? Not much, but there are a few hadiths (Prophetic words from The Prophet Muhammad PBUH) and verses from the Quran that you can gently instill into your child’s mind. Reading them with your loved ones each day may not only help you with your mission, but also is rewarding and beneficial for both you and the family members.

Here are some prophetic words & Quran verses to replace your, “it is sinful to lie” phrase.

The first one is this, from surah Al-Baqarah verse 42, in which Allah say in a very subtle way, “And do not mix truth with falsehood, and do not conceal the truth while you know.(2:42)”It is a good reminder to instill into your child about speaking the truth especially on serious matters where truth is the objective we seek. When using the Quran verse, not only you are doing an ibadah for enlightening the family with Quranic values, but also leave your child with very little room to go continue exaggerating his lies.

Secondly, there is also a whole lot of a chapter from the Quran named Munafiqoon which means The Hypocrites. Here, the munafiqoon are given 3 characteristics one of which is the liars. I will not advice you to use this verse towards your child as it is quite harsh to call someone a munafiq (a hypocrite). Instead, inculcate to them the danger and Allah’s restriction for being a liar.

Not only the Quran teach us the characteristics of a hypocrite, but it also teaches us what it takes to be forgiven. In the chapter, Al-Ghafir, verse 28, Allah said that, “If he is a liar, his lying will rebound upon him; but if he is truthful, then some of what he promises you will befall you. God does not guide the extravagant imposter (40:28).” This verse can be the best one to replace your judgmental, “it is sinful to lie” phrase. It is good sometimes to teach the young ones the consequences of their own action so that they are more watchful of what they want to utter every time they speak.

Beside all the verses from the Quran, the Prophet Muhammad PBUH also once said, that those who tell lies are not among his followers (Riwayat Muslim). As a Muslim, we take our Prophet as our leader, hence, whatever that he forbid us to do must also be followed. Again, it is so noble to be able to teach your child this value rather than nagging. Ibnu Qayyim also once quoted that the tongue will show you what’s in his heart whether he likes it or not.

Lastly, I would also love to share this verse from the Quran as a reminder for us, especially parents that in the Holy Quran, Allah said in surah Al-Taghabun (64:15),”your possessions and your children are a test, but with God is a splendid reward.” In another chapter, Allah mentioned in surah Munafiqoon, verse 9: “O you who believe! Let neither your possessions nor your children distract you from the remembrance of God. Whoever does that-these are the losers (63:9)”. We should all take our time to ponder upon these verses from time to time as we grow our children. Most of all, why don’t we remind ourselves about these verses first before we share them with others? Despite being adults, we too need to correct ourselves from time to time, insyaAllah.

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Let Us Protect and Preserve the Good Instinct of Our Children

In its premier state, our instinct holds on to only one principle: this innate principle of our instinct, the ‘principle of conservation of our physical well-being’, is in perfect conformity with (as well as complementary to) the principle of our conscience (the moral principle). Another principle as an integral part of human instinct is the ‘pleasure principle’, which emerges latter and, in its premier state, is also in perfect conformity with (as well as complementary to) both the ‘principle of conservation of our physical well-being’ and principle of our conscience (the moral principle).

This lets our will to alternately lend itself to the impulses of our instinct and conscience without having to sacrifice its wholesomeness which, in turn, depends upon the absence of any inner conflict of the will. Thereby, in its primal and natural state our will is, fundamentally, one and the same. At the premier state of human instinct, the will continues to be one and the same. For, in the absence of any conflict between the instinct and conscience there exists no inner conflict of the will that can, supposedly, result in the destruction of its wholesomeness. We are all born with this Natural Will.

Serious problem arises when the ‘pleasure principle’ and the premier ‘principle of conservation of physical well-being’ are no longer in conformity with and complementary to each other whereby the instinct is in conflict with itself, owing to the conflict between its two contending principles. Nevertheless, the instinct continues to maintain these two distinct and separate principles as before, – only with this change (and this is a significant change) that the instinct doesn’t have the wholesomeness (i.e. integrity) that it has been characterized by at the time when these principles have been complementary rather than conflicting.

As this process of deformity continues, human instinct is eventually and ultimately split into two distinct and separate entities, one of which (the premier principle of conservation of physical well-being) would like to perform in accordance with the supreme principle of our conscience, while the other (the pleasure principle) is ceaselessly striving against it.

As a result of this ongoing process, the heart of our instinct is, eventually, destroyed as the innate principle of our instinct – the premier ‘principle of conservation of physical well-being’ – ultimately gives in to (and, in turn, is engulfed by) the ‘pleasure principle’ as the final outcome of this process of degradation. This is what ultimately happens to the instinct of children when they persistently see people engaged in pleasurable activities that are harmful to their physical well-being: eventually, the former internalize such practices as a social norm, and are conditioned by it; and as young adults, they (in turn) get involved in pleasurable activities as such.

The will of these children is ultimately torn asunder owing to the persistent conflict between the instinct and the conscience and is no longer capable of maintaining its characteristic wholesomeness (i.e. integrity). This post-natural state of will as such is the key to all social injustices and inequality. For, when the will of the individuals, or most of the individuals, within any society lacks integrity, the very basis for social justice and equality is lost.

Is it possible to preserve and protect our good instinct so that when we seek pleasure in our lives we don’t end up compromising our physical well-being or that of others? One way to accomplish this would be providing our children with moral, ethical, and religious teaching and appropriate guidance within a peaceful, loving, caring, and, above all, a natural environment. Within such environment and under such teaching and guidance, purity and natural state of their instinct could possibly be ensured against aforementioned deformity and be protected and preserved in years to come; perhaps, through their lifetime.

The key is to give the children: a marvelous childhood. And this would never be: until and unless we let them grow within a natural environment with the minimum of protection, safeguard, and care, letting the nature take care of the child – most of the time, if not all the time. We need to let the children know the marvels of nature; and, thus, be entertained by the nature. In consequence, they will stay natural, their instinct will also stay natural and pure. With instinct as such, they will care for and be mindful of physical well-being of people around them, as they care for and mindful of their own physical well-being.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Mohammed_Iftekharuddin/2389179

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Can We Actually Stop These Student School Shootings?

Just so you know my Father was a passionate person about hunting! Downstairs in our finished basement we had a wood glass case he built for his gun collection. It was situated adjacent to a full bar where my parents entertained. He was proud and knowledgeable about his guns showing explaining about them. The gun case had no locks, myself nor any of my friends wouldn’t have ever considered taking a gun out without permission. Safety was priority on how I was taught to handle and carry them. Dad was proud of his two pointing dogs, as well as being part of his prestigious hunting club. When I was a baby he started calling me skeet, this is a type of shooting sport with clay birds. My mother wasn’t thrilled when he bought me my first gun at 10 years old. As matter of fact he had written on the handle, can you guess, “The Skeet”! We lived in a suburban area, my father would make a target at the back of our garage, we would stand at the end of the driveway outside teaching me precision. The neighbors were never alarmed or called the police, they knew it was just Jerry doing his thing. In those days people could go buy a gun and ammo at any local hardware or sports store, no license, criminal check or anything. I would also bet after reading my background with guns above, no one would have guessed I’m Canadian! I thought it was important to share this info prior to my opinion why there are so many school shootings.

I just published anther article here called ‘Are We Setting-up Our Children to Fail”. The people who know their children best are their parents. It really saddens me to think that a teenager could be so unhappy they have the courage to kill themselves. As well as feel the need to takeout innocent fellow students with them. It seems most of these teen student shooters didn’t do this spontaneously, but after a fair amount of consideration. How did their parents not detect their child having issues before these unfortunate school shooting situations? Was there a lack of daily communication with their teenagers? When my son grew-up and even now I asked questions like how was your day? Even more delving when he was younger what happened at school today, do you have homework, what did you do at lunch? If I felt knowing him there was any detection of a problem through body language, how he answered me, or tone of voice we would talk. I know somethings wrong, tell me what happened at school or with your friends? He might have said nothing at the beginning, but with kindness I kept probing until it came out. Our way of assisting him not to have enraged anger with us as an outlet, if he had been depressed we would have taken the proper measures. No sane parent would want their child to feel the only solution was death. Even more outrageous is a teenager taking some other innocent students with them, cause other families such unacceptable pain and misery.

My last article named at the beginning which is a basic concept of old world child rearing. If we teach our kids to have manors, be respectful, and a healthy fear of authority. Those for me are the major reasons why I never removed guns from my fathers unlocked gun case. I knew that if I did something wrong there would consequences for my actions. My parents also monitored what I watched on television. Perhaps parents now might want to see what is going on their kid’s cellphones, computers, social media, and not allow use of video games that are based on killing and violence. I don’t think the problem is needing more gun control laws, but parenting providing their children with more home training for life in the real world. These are my suggestions on how decrease these epidemic school shootings

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Arnold_Nadler/56474

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Are We Setting Our Children Up to Fail?

I’m concerned with many of the modern-day parenting concepts. In my era there were more defined parental rules for children to be success as adults. Taught and Ingrained into kids back then were expectations like being well- mannered, respecting elders, obeying the law, listening to authority figures, doing well in school, and religious beliefs. All this was teaching a child how to be a decent respectful adult with values. If any of these expectations were not fulfilled, there was consequences for those actions. It all depended on the infraction as to the punishments handed-out which were grounded, no television, no biking as the worst one being spanked on the bum. Disciplining children to me is not child abuse, but much of society believes reasoning with kids makes more sense then punishment. It is my opinion every person must understand the difference between right and wrong. A healthy fear would be understanding there are consequences for those actions. As an adult if someone steals a car there is no reasoning, it’s a crime they go to jail having a criminal record. Kids are not born knowing any of this, it is there parents who teach them what is and is not acceptable in the world.

If you’re upbringing is balanced with affection, encouragement, praise, and tough love then a person’s chances to succeed are much greater. Where I live they have instilled a program in schools called no child left behind. Which means if your kid can’t add two plus two, or is failing classes they still pass to the next grade. The idea is not to hurt any child’s feelings, so when they leave high school illiterate how does that make sense? The real question is how come those parents who have kids failing are not helping? I also believe that most of these children who are diagnosed with A.D.H.D, need a swift kick in the butt to straighten them out. There are some kids who have it, but the majority I think are not getting the proper home training. Now both the kids and the parents have an excuse for their child’s bad behavior, poor work etc… The interesting part is that the ones who have potential are not funded, but the kid with A.D.H.D gets teachers aides etc… In my youth I was given an allowance for doing things around the house. If they weren’t done or not properly no allowance. When I did get it, if blown in one day, no more until next weeks allowance learning fiscal responsibility. Today kids are provided thousands of dollars of merchandise in cellphones, laptops, and gaming devices. Not earning these things, just expecting them to be there isn’t how life works. When they become adults, they have a sense of entitlement.

I believe we need to start taking the time to teach our children better, this way they are really prepared for life ahead. If not, as we are seeing already a large percentage of young adults are failing at life.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Arnold_Nadler/56474

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Travel Tips for Your Family

Having children does not mean you have to stop traveling. Although there are still many families waiting for the children to be of a certain age, or leaving them with other relatives to take long trips, the tendency to take the children with them is on the rise. A great news if we take into account that Spain has always been in line in Europe in terms of family trips abroad. Until now, a large majority still preferred Spanish coasts or camps to enjoy the summer. And, although both plans are very respectable, it is not the children who cut our wings to travel the world.

Find a destination that suits the little ones

Travel with your family

There are many countries that have great attractions for children. Water parks, attractions, themed, with animals, hotels where there are activities for them or places frequented by other families where our children can meet more children. Try to find common activities according to their age and call their attention. For example, in Asia a good idea is to introduce them to the snorkel and enjoy the seabed. In the jungle you can see different types of animals, zip line or play sports.

Choose direct routes

If you travel by plane, avoid flights have scales. If they have them, then they are not very long. Try, in addition, that the schedules are good for the children and that they do not break their biorhythm. During the trip, feel them near the windows, so you can go contemplating the landscape and have a further distraction. If the flight is at night, be sure to ask the stewardess for a blanket and pillow. The more rested they reach the destination the better they will feel. If the trip is long, we recommend that you bring them some entertainment. Some companies have sheets and paintings to distract you, also with coloring drawings and magazines where you can take advantage of the maps of the last pages to show them geography.

Includes the essential

Depending on the country you are traveling to, it will be convenient to carry everything your children need. It is better not to leave anything to improvisation, especially in medicines. Always carry a first-aid kit by hand. You never know if you can find medicines easily or at what price.

Do not be afraid

Many families acknowledge not taking their children with them for fear of something happening. However, there are many countries that are safer than ours. If traveling alone or as a couple, no mishap occurs, why would it happen to our children? What’s more, taking the children with us will open doors for us. In some countries in Asia or Africa, families tend to be very numerous, so they will be happy to help you, meet you and possibly your children will end up playing with ours.

Slow down

Although during the day they seem unstoppable and have more energy than us, children usually get tired before. Avoid long journeys full of visits, museums, meals composed by something quick and wanting to squeeze the trip to the top. Learn to enjoy a relaxed pace, with longer breaks so that children have time to eat and rest. The days will end sooner and you may have seen fewer things, but you will have enjoyed them longer.

Adapt to your schedules

Depending on the age, the child will have pre-established habits. Even if you are in the other part of the world and have the feeling that time does not exist, it is best not to alter them. Try that the different meals are at the same hours, that you sleep as necessary or that you are in bed at the established times. This will avoid that fatigue will lead to tantrums and that in the end it will be an uncomfortable situation for everyone.

Simplify

Depending on the age you will need more or less things. If your child does not walk, then here the question arises: Baby carrier or backpack? The only answer is destiny. If you are going to travel to a city where the streets are paved and it is easy to get around them, then you can afford to take the chair. If what you have planned is to do some hiking in the mountains, visit old villages or do outdoor activities, then the most comfortable thing is a baby carrier. During the trip you will see that many parents have also chosen this option. Forget about cribs, changing tables or other items. Many hotels already count on it.

Find more family travel tips from our site http://babymood.webs.com

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Bully Busting 101 Part 1

The Nanny State approach to stop people from being bullied is a dismal failure. Bullies are able to run free without accountability and schools are being held legally liable. (Yes, schools are being sued over students being bullied.)

The bullying problem usually starts at home. You only have to watch some of the children’s sports to watch how the parents threaten and disrespect sports officials, such as hockey games. These same parents bully their kids if their kids perform poorly. The kids, in turn take their anger out on children whom they can bully.

When I was in high school, I recall the school vice principal talking excitedly about a “good hockey fight” during the high school hockey games. Yet, I got sent to the school office trying to defend myself against a classroom bully. Even then, the school was fine with fights occurring off of the school grounds. Then came a change in culture due to the imported gangster mentality, lower morales and the narcissistic attitudes where swarming and open use of weapons and drugs was acceptable.

The mass-murdering school shooter is NOT a bullied child (or a Goth). In the Columbine shooting, the leader, Eric Harris came from an upper class family, with a retired major for a father. Harris plotted to kill people a year before the attack.

It is often the bully themselves who want to step up their show of power. Bully shooters will tend to not shoot other bullies.

Single parent families are the norm nowadays with a lack of father or authority figures in many children’s lives. Certain codes of conduct have gone by the wayside with teachers, religious leaders, politicians and even some law enforcement. So, where do young people go for protection if their parent or parents are tired from work or too involved with their own activities? Or the teachers who are busy with their own weird agendas (eg. workshops for cross-dressing).

“Zero-tolerance” for violence in schools just gives the bullies more freedom. The good students abide by the rules, while the bullies have a hey day. I know of a martial artist whose teenaged son was punched by a school bully in the school hallway. Rather than defend himself, the teen obeyed the school rules of putting his hands behind his back and walking away. The bully was allowed to walk around a punch other students with no fear of accountability.

Pink shirt day is another useless attempt to control the problem. Public figures like to make a huge production out of making speeches and showing off a pink shirt to show their support. When, it does not solve the problem.

Self-protection starts with the individual. They need to like, respect and believe in themselves. Fitness and self-defence is a good start as it gives the individual the confidence to do other things rather than be afraid most of the time.

Fortunately, it is a simple process and worth every minute of it.

To start, you have to decide on training, eating and sleeping differently. For the next two months, you have to treat yourself like an athlete. See part two for how to do this.

Doug Setter holds a Bachelor’s of Food and Nutrition. He has served as a paratrooper and U.N. Peacekeeper, has completed 5 full marathons and climbed Mt. Rainier. He held a welterweight kick-boxing title at age 40. He consults clients in alcohol reduction, stomach-flattening, kick-boxing and nutrition. He is the author of Strength Endurance Secrets,Stomach Flattening, Reduce Your Alcohol Craving and One Less Victim. Visit his website: http://www.2ndwindbodyscience.com

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Interpreting Our World

When other adults came for me after school, my teacher would tell them how nasty I was, how undeserving, how worthless. The other adults listened to the teacher and accepted her words, thus confirming her version in my child’s mind.

Every word, every act, every gesture I experienced at the time convinced me day after day that I deserved being abused.

Then my classmates learned that I was to be abused, that they should push me or ignore me, hurt me any way they wanted. Their role model, our teacher, was showing them how it was done.

Their actions confirmed what I was already starting to believe. I deserved nothing, no love, no friendship, no respect. I was nothing. I was less than nothing. I was a target.

By the time my parents realized what was going on, I had already become a victim. I subconsciously believed that I deserved what I got, that I deserved no better. I wasn’t even aware of the belief. Neither were my parents. They only understood that the teacher had been nasty to me. So they transferred me to another school.

My first day at the new school was a nightmare. I was so scared to encounter my new enemies and abusers and so utterly convinced that I deserved them that I tried to shrink into my own body. Reality was to prove me a victim again, of course. My new teacher didn’t insult me or harass me but chose to ridicule me and sat me at her table for everyone to clearly see how undeserving I was. She took my My new classmates immediately understood how unimportant I was. And then there was Phil, my new abuser, the kid in my class that took it upon himself to chase me down and make fun of me so the other children would look up at him. He would find the ugliest ways to hurt me while laughing at me and making others find the fun in it.

My parents tried to get help. But nobody understood why I was being abused by different people in different places. That only seemed to prove that I was somehow causing the situation, being the only common denominator in all scenes.

So my first teacher was right, wasn’t she? Life proved her right. I deserved nothing. I was only worth the fun I made others have by mocking and hurting me. I truly was and deserved to be a victim.

School after school abusers immediately identified the victim in me and used me as a stepping stone on their way to greater heights. Life confirmed my belief every single day. I was a victim.

A few years later I was a complete mess. I couldn’t face school or children. They terrified me. I had truly, completely victimized myself not even being aware that such a possibility existed. Nobody in my world understood that either. There was only doubt and confusion. No professional could explain why there was always somebody ready to abuse me. Some people suspected that I felt abused when no real abuse had been given. But I knew what I knew. Life was abuse; everywhere I looked, everywhere I lived, abuse lived there, too, and had me as its target.

Until one day somebody told me that I was a victim. “Victim” what a word. That person explained to me that I had become a victim by believing that interpretation of myself. We reviewed my life story from that perspective and I fully understood how I had come to interpret and see myself as a victim of others. From that first teacher who held all power to the weakest kid ever insulting me, I BELIEVED I deserved their treatment of me because I WAS A VICTIM! That was my role in life.

Together we went over my life and took examples of the abuse I had suffered. That person helped me see that I had become a victim because that’s what I believed myself to be. She also explained that abusers believed that only by stepping on others and using them to raise themselves higher could they be respected and appreciated. Most of them learned that behavior at home and turned it into their own belief. They were not abusing me to make me hurt; they didn’t even see me! They were abusing me because they believed it was the only way in which they would grow and be seen by others. I was not a person but a means.

Understanding my life story from this new perspective, I realized how I had come to believe myself a victim. My first teacher had first introduced that worldview into my mind. By holding power over me, I had believed her to be right. By confirming her view, my incipient belief was then strengthened and solidified until there was no other possible interpretation in my mind. Everything I saw from then on was only confirmation of my subconscious belief.

Our beliefs are always confirmed by our reality because they act as its filter. My experience thus confirmed my victim’s role in life over and over again. Until that one person helped me see that I was NOT a victim but had chosen to believe I was. She also showed me that I could choose something else for me. I could reinterpret my past from that new perspective and so understand that I had not been abused but had instead victimized myself. Every insult, every punch, every comment had been proof of my victim’s role.

That day I decided to change my worldview and interpret my life story from a different perspective. ‘I am no more a victim,’ I declared. And true to my new belief, the world never again attacked me. Because I was not a victim anymore. By believing myself a NON-VICTIM, reality had to prove me right.

And it has. These last years have given me proof after proof of my non-victim role in life. There still are many people out there who need to step on others to gain respect but they never choose me anymore as their stepping stone. When looking around for somebody to be their victim, they don’t see me. Because I am not a victim anymore. I don’t come out in their radar. I’m not a victim and I am nos perceived as one by them.

This is the story I wanted to tell you and the way in which I interpreted it. After all, life is a matter of interpretation. What story I tell myself will end up becoming my story. All stories can be told from many different perspectives. After all, narrators choose how to tell them, don’t they?

Enjoy life… ALL of it,

Discover humanology, optimism coaching, personal essence and much more http://www.jessicajlockhart.com/en

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